Because 2016 has been character building (to say the least), next year we welcome grace, ease and effortlessness. Got that, Universe? #affirmed
This year has been big. To be honest, it was a total sh*t storm of change, growth, growing pains, and discomfort, on many fronts. But because sh*t storms (ultimately) teach you a lot, welcome: our year-end reflections.
14 Year End Reflections On The Wonderful Mess Of Being Human
1. Do the inner work.
Honest introspection (aka inner alchemy) combined with inspired action is everything. Seriously everything.
2. Change is inevitable.
Stop resisting it. This is hard, especially when you’re a control freak like me, which I just realized I am thanks to radically honest introspection (see: above), and my radically observant and reality checking boyfriend (see: below).
As difficult as it is to accept change (especially unexpected change), try not to argue with reality. It doesn’t get you anywhere. Instead, embrace change as a catalyst for growth.
3. Love your people.
LOVE the people you love and tell them you love them, often.
(Because at some point they will die.)
4. Death, wow. So f*&king painful.
When the few people you cannot live without die, you will be lost. You will be broken. You will feel like your heart has been ripped out of your chest. You will never get over these losses. Ever. You’re not supposed to. But the person will live fully again in your heart, at some point, and make you smile at incredibly inappropriate times or burst into tears, or both, simultaneously. And you will feel love. Insane love, overwhelming love you can’t explain in words, just feelings, so I will not even begin to try.
5. What you feel is always an important indicator.
Be honest with yourself. If you think something is negatively affecting you, it probably is. This goes for most things in life: boys, dairy, staying up til 3am… etc. Your gut is an oracle, listen to it.
“Denial will hold your hand until it punches you in the face.” -Amy Woodside
6. Know the small things that will ruin you.
This is huge. Some days it doesn’t take much for me to feel like my life is completely spiraling out of control. The small things that destroy me are: insufficient sleep (when Netflix is winning the war I crumble), constipation (yes, I went there), comparing myself to other people, spending too much time on the computer, not taking breaks, endless to-do lists, dehydration, and hypoglycemia (which, is basically code for not eating the way I want to eat). You know, just all the #firstworldproblems I feel totally guilty admitting.
Which leads us to…
7. Go easy on yourself.
You don’t have to deny any part of yourself. Whatever you feel, you’re allowed to feel it, without feeling guilty about feeling that way in the first place. This includes but is not limited to the hurt, the heartbreak, the rage, the jealousy, the doubt, the anger, the overwhelm, the frustration, and all of the other weird, messy inconsistent feelings that go along with being human. Judging yourself for judging yourself or adding negativity and shame to what you’re already feeling is where the problem (and pain) is. You don’t have to deny any part of yourself. You’re human, and you’re growing and evolving and changing and those^^ thoughts and emotions you’ve deemed “bad” or unacceptable are human thoughts and emotions, remember that.
8. Being human in a world with very little tolerance for humanity is sometimes difficult.
It’s 1000 percent OKAY to fall apart. Lose your sh*t, find your calm. We’re all just trying to figure it out. If you’re currently struggling with something, you can safely assume 200,000+ other people are also currently struggling with that SAME thing. And, 200,000+ more people have struggled with it at some point in their lives.
The goal is not to have your life under control, it’s learning to love the beautiful mess.
9. Perspective changes everything.
10. It’s OKAY to change your mind.
Even if it doesn’t make any logical sense at the time. Your opinion can and probably will change. That’s OKAY. Last time we checked your opinion is your’s, which means, you guessed it, YOU are allowed to change it.
That thing you thought you wanted? You might not want it anymore. Be okay with that.
11. On work and worth.
Your worth has nothing (I repeat: NOTHING), to do with your productivity level. And for the record, everything does *not* need to get done today. The world will not implode if you do not respond to that email by 5pm.
12. On overworking.
If you are burnt out, continuing to burn is not the answer. It’s a hard concept to grasp, I know. However, almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you.
13. Always eat dessert.
14. Don’t take things so seriously.
This is the only way to get through life.
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